The Auburn Journal published a pair of guest op-eds today.  Charlie Brown spent his inches on ethical leadership and the many challenges we face right now from ending the Iraq War to the record gas prices.  And what about Doolittle?  Well, he whined, a lot.

There was a nice little consipracy theory.

In fact, the search occurred after my attorney had a meeting with the government, and I now believe that the search of our home was in large measure an attempt to strong arm my wife in order to get me to admit to a crime – a crime that I did not commit.

Right, so the FBI raided the house of a sitting Congressman to try and scare his wife.  Somehow, I don’t think a judge would approve of such a raid, but don’t let me stop you from your tin foil hat theory.

Now let the real whining begin…

During the search, Julie was sequestered in the kitchen and not allowed to move without an escort. She was not even allowed to use the bathroom in our own home without an FBI agent escorting her there.

Oh the horror….  Sounds like standard practice to me.  There is a reason for these rules John, they don’t want you destroying evidence.  See, they are investigating a crime and are looking for evidence.  Your wife could have stashed some in the bathroom and attempt to flush it down the toilet or something.

It wasn’t just the bathroom escort bothering Doolittle…

Even though the search warrant only pertained to items related to Julie’s business, agents seized many personal items that clearly had no relevance to their investigation.

Julie’s personal journals, sensitive information about our two children, phone lists and personal files were all taken and have yet to be returned. They even took her mobile phone and Ipod.

Hate to burst your bubble John, but phone lists and cell phones are pretty commonly used to conduct business.  As for the journal, who knows what your wife wrote down about her activities with Abramoff.

Doolittle isn’t done with the conspiracies yet.  He even drags in Gonzales.

Then four days later, details of the search were leaked to a Washington, D.C., newspaper.

I do not believe it was a coincidence that the leak came the day before Attorney General Alberto Gonzales testified before Congress on charges that his office was overly partisan in its firing of eight U.S. Attorneys, especially considering Gonzales specifically cited his recent prosecution of Republican members of Congress as evidence to the contrary.

WTF?  I have read this paragraphs three times and I still don’t get what he is trying to say here.  Is he trying to claim that someone tied to Gonzales leaked word about the investigation to bolster support for the Attorney General?  Sorry, but one raid will not undo the damage done by the Attorney General and his staff, nor did it do anything to take the heat off of you.

I feel like I need to cleanse my eyes after reading that hooey.  How about a quote from Charlie’s column.

Every day, I hear from citizens of all political stripes who want to move beyond the era of scandal ridden pay-to-play politics, and toward a fresh start, a hopeful future, and real solutions to the problems we face in the 4th District and across the country.

I agree. So I’m devoting the remainder of this column to the challenges that I believe we can overcome together, when this sad era of corruption and scandal finally comes to a close.

Like most Americans, military leaders, and the Iraq Study Group, I believe open-ended involvement in Iraq’s civil war is preventing us from defeating the real enemy – al-Qaida. We need to work in a bi-partisan fashion to bring our heroic troops home from Iraq, and launch a diplomatic surge to restore America’s credibility around the world.

Then and only then, will we be able to reunite our country and the international community around the most pressing cause of our time, and redeploy our forces to the real frontlines in the war on terror.

Unfortunately, by paying record prices for gas, we are helping to fund the very people who are trying to hurt us. That’s why America can and must commit to a program to achieve energy independence in 10 years. And if Brazil can do it, so can the U.S.

Aaah I feel a bit better.